23 things

At age 22, I started stripping. For the next fifteen years I worked off and on as a dominatrix, porn actress, and escort. Now I’m 49.

Here are 23 things I know now that I WISH I KNEW THEN:

#1: Save Your Money. Save your money. Save your money

#2: You are sexy as fuck

#3: After 40, Nobody Cares

#4: Ignore the Competition

#5: You are never too old

#6: Compound Interest is your best friend

#7: Anger is a drug

#8: It's okay to let people go

#9: The people who get you are everything

#10: Hurt People Hurt People

#11: There's More To Money Than Making It (Way, Way More)

#12: The Hate Radio in Your Head Has an Off Switch

#13: Sex Work does not define you now; it will not define you forever

#14: Sex Work Doesn't Have to be fun (In fact, it's often better if it isn't)

#15: Don't Assume that anyone is better off than you

#16: Pay your taxes (Not sexy-- I know)

#17: You can fire any client for any reason any time (and maybe you should)

#18: Loneliness, Isolation, & Boredom are choices

#19: It's never just about sex (Well, hardly ever)

#20: Have an emergency plan

#21: Know your business

#22: Forgive yourself

#23: Sex workers need love too (In fact, we need it most of all)